Tuesday, February 24, 2009

The Curious Case of Underdog Millionaire

And there he sat, amidst the bright stage with people biting their nails while their heart skipped more than just a beat, on the hot seat on his road to becoming a millionaire or “millioner” as some people would pronounce it. He couldn’t believe it in the first place that he actually was there. He was sitting on the hot seat of “Who wants to be a Millioner? Part 2”

Already a champ after mysterious circumstances…

I meant the game, not the Oscars. I play safe.

… there he was to make more so the show would attract more viewers than the last time when it hit an all time low…

Again, I meant the game, not the Oscars.

... they hoped to do better this time after having received complaints that million dollar questions such as ‘Who is the third musketeer from the book “The Three Musketeers”?’ were a puzzle even for Leonardo Da Vinci, …

Why wouldn’t it be? Dumas wasn’t even an embryo at that period. Hence the clever phrase.

… the questions were brought down so this time, they explicitly were a part of your own history.
So, the hero, with only 2 more questions to go for his second “victory”, he found it hard to open his eyes for the next question.

Host: Hey man! Don’t worry; this is going to be easy.
Hero: Oh really!? Dim down the over bright lights will you?
Host: Ha ha ha! Such humor from a former Chaiwala! Anyway, here is your 10 Million Rupees question.

Which part of your body got hit by the famous book “The Three Musketeers” written by Alexander Dumas? Your options are
A. Nose
B. Head
C. Teeth
D. Butt

Hero: Hmmm… (intense thrilling music at the background while the hero thinks and rushes through his memories)
Host (to add to the tension): If you get this right, you will move one step closer to winning 20 million rupees.

I know math. So shut up.

The host had given an answer to the hero again, when they met at the restroom. Now the hero remembered being beaten up by the girl bully of his class.

Hero: It’s A. Head
Host (Whispers): Sure? Is it not C. Teeth?
Hero: The way I got hit, I would have an empty garage in my mouth. So, I’m sure it’s A. Head
Host: Are you sure it’s not an empty garage up there?

Sometimes I can be mundane.

Host: Anyway, I’ll lock it. Computer! Please lock A. Head please!

After a deliberate break, the Host shouts in ecstasy that the hero got it right.

Host (slowly):
Here is your final and 20 million dollar question!

What is the name of the book with which you received a bashing at school? Your options are
A. History Book
B. The Three Musketeers
C. The Telephone Directory
D. Beat yourself with Fountain Head by Ayn Rand after reading it

Hero: hmmm…Gosh! I don’t seem to remember!

That explains the bitter incident, confirming the answer to the previous question.

Host: Well, you have one life line left. It’s called “Phone your girlfriend”. You have time for personal questions too as the number has been added to our “Closed User Groups”. So, the call is free of charge.

The Hero calls up his girlfriend and asks her the question.

Girlfriend: Are you alright??
Hero (Elated): Yes, I am!
Girlfriend: Well...Your psychiatrist asked you not to recall such memories for your well being sake.

And the call cut abruptly. It was a Vodafone number.

Hero: hmmm… ok… I’m guessing it. Here goes… it’s B. The Three Musketeers.
Host: Are you sure?
Hero: Yes. You can lock it without further mundane questions.
Host: Computer! Please Lock B. The Three Musketeers.

As usual, a music for the thrill, which obviously ended on a happy note as the host and the hero were ecstatic after winning “Who wants to be a Millioner? Part 2”!

Needless to say, another director venturing into India made a movie out of it.

The Movie won 8 Oscars.

13 comments:

Vivek said...

ha ha ha ha
My thoughts exactly!
The book didn't seem so lame though!
:D

ArchFULLY said...

sarcastic one!!! I enjoyed reading it

Hema Hariharan said...

Heheh! Good one! :)
I don't know what the whole deal about the movie was. Thought it was just about OK. But well we all know how Shawshank Redemption never won, so ;)

Rakesh Vanamali said...

Lol! This is heights! ;)

Vibushan Lakshminarayan said...

@Vivek
:D Havent read the book. But the movie was certainly not worth it.

@Archfully
Thanks :)

@Hema Hariharan
Ha ha :) Its almost certain that Oscars did it just to increase its market.

@Rakesh
:D :D

Jayaprasad said...

Very funny.... I am at the wits end :) Anyway v all can be happy atleast for the fact that 2 indians hav won it. :)

A wo(a)ndering mind said...

:D nice post!!
My only elation with regard to the movie is Rahman winning 2 on the same night.. although as we all might know he has ofcourse done way better music than the ones he won!

Vibushan Lakshminarayan said...

@Wo(a)ndering Mind

:D Thanks.. Yeah.. Rahman has given us better. I'd just say Oscars did it to increase their viewers after a threat to cancel some contract of theirs if it didn't meet up to the requirements this time.

@Jayaprasad
More than Indians winning, i'd say its more a manipulation, a story behind a curtain.

Nivedita said...

:) that was a crazy post.! But, YES.! its j-u-s-t yet another movie that can be watched.! Editing is worth it, but i wonder wat in it defines 'Oscar - BEST picture'!!!

Vivek said...

Its funny how if the movie was a made by an Indian, USA would have never heard of ARR!

Rakesh Vanamali said...

Long time no posts! Hope you are doing well! Do find time to update!

Kanz said...

One of ur best.. Loved the Title too :)

Vibushan L Narayan said...

@Nivedita
Thanks :)

@Kanz
:) Danke man :D