The She that Wanted to Be - III

August 15th, 2013.

With all the pseudo-patriotic "Statuses" floating around Facebook proudly proclaiming themselves as Indians and India being the best country in the world despite it's obvious major problems including rampant corruption, rape, infanticides, sectarian politics and too much cricket, I decided to add one more to the list- Having this conversation with her impulsive self.

"Hey, Happy Independence day", I said. Very normally.

"Happy Independence day to you too! India is the best country in the world!" She exclaimed.

"Is that supposed to be patriotism?"

"Yes! I'm proud to be an Indian!"

I didn't want to quote George Bernard Shaw and George Carlin on national and ethnic pride but I decided to avoid it lest I suffer burn injuries. Instead, I decided to play along.

"Then why do you reside in the US?"

"Because US is the go-to place and the money is good!"

"Are you saying you'd give up your principles for money?" Might say a lot about her if she had said yes.

"No No! Because my job sent me there."

"Why would you leave the best country in the world because your job sends you somewhere else?"

"Because my job is important to me! That's why!"

"So you'd put your self-interest before your country. Then why would you call yourself patriotic?"

"I'M PATRIOTIC BECAUSE I THINK I AM. Now you can bugger off!" Ah the cogito.

An Indian living in the US using a British slang... Hmm.. I'm guessing she was just being polite with the word bugger.

"So it's just a feeling. You don't know why you love your country though?"

You played the bugger card too soon milady

At this point, I had already put on my shoes to ready myself when she chases me like a reaper. Her kind-hearted self decided to give up instead.

Dedicated to all the skin-deep patriots "proud" Indians. 

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The She that Wanted to Be - II

"Hey! .. How was your day?" She asked.

"Quite hectic. With the marriage nearing, I couldn't ask for more."

"Mine's been hectic too."

I knew she was gonna say that. After spending years trying to get to know her, i could not make the mistake of misjudgment.

My day was hectic, so was hers. Mine was damn bad, so was hers. I had a huge friend's circle, she had an even bigger one. So she thought.

"So, A long weekend comin' your way.. big plans?"

"yep. I want to learn 4 languages. I want to learn to play the piano. And I want to draw my own caricature on a big paper." she said.

A long weekend is usually 3 days. Not a lifetime.

"Great. So, when do you plan to start?"

"Tomorrow. Today, has been hectic!"

"What!? you don't even work!"

"Its been hard.."

"To whhat?"

"To find a mystery egg."

I took out a gun and shot her. No. I wanted to do that... But she would have mauled me in the afterlife.

I just laughed while sulking.

Ban farmville. Get a life.

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The She that Wanted to Be

Some people just think the world revolves around them. Period.

There was this girl that I knew or rather “mis-knew“who, was beyond doubt quite good looking, decent at academics and from an affluent family. She was also the kind who was quite emotional. She’d describe even climbing up a stair as a Herculean task if she had done it, otherwise would just pass it off as worthless. She also had a few guys approach her. Well, probably that got to her head. I wouldn’t know nor do I wish to.

The other day, we were having a mundane conversation and I was quite on the listening side. Some people call that to be good. I don’t know. I just asked her how life was though I knew what the reply would be.

“Terrible… really… all these subjects that I study are real tough. I don’t know what to do…”, came the reply.

I offered a simple solution that even a 2 year old would have. “Study of course!”

“I know that dumbass. But you wouldn’t understand. These are tough with a capital T. Just real problems. You don’t know what I’m facing.”

For a moment I thought she was working for NASA. I regretted having opened my mouth to provide a solution. Being a moderate conversationalist seemed like a boon. To divert the talk I asked her how her life was, GENERALLY. Her friends and stuff like that.

“My friends are great! We have this Huuuge group of 6 friends. We have fun that other groups would just be jealous of.”

My group consisted of 8 people and I wasn’t “ecstatic” about it.
“What kind of fun??” Pardon my curious nature.

“Regularly eating out, bunking class, chewing gum during class hours, you know, awesomeness everywhere!!”

Mundane fun magnified. After a search in vain for a reply, I said “hmmm…”

“Also, some of the guys in my class are looking at me and are like… ‘oooo… that girl…who’s she?’ . The guys keep looking at me and talk about me. I know that”

This time I didn’t even want to “hmmm…” a reply.

“I keep getting these mails from these people. It’s like they are tracking me. After a few days, they resend the mails begging me to ‘please respond to the requests’”

I was listening though not intently at the ramblings. Then came the least expected statement.

“The best part is I get these kinds of mails even from girls. I can understand boys. But girls, well… (laughing)”

“Really? What kind of mails? “, I asked.

“When you come home the next time I’ll show you”

A few days later I dropped by. I remembered the mails and asked her about it. She agreed but warned me not to let this out and here I am blogging it. You’ll know why.

We sat in front of the computer and she opened her mail box. Then she grouped the mails that’s she spoke about and then showed them to me.

The subject of the mails read “You have been Tagged”.

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